Bacon-Wrapped Shrimp Cakes

Yay, bacon! I really wanted some bacon wrapped shrimp, but all I have is these little baby shrimp at the moment, and (thankfully) they do not make baby bacon strips. Thus: shrimp cakes. These were pretty tasty on their own (surprisingly, pan-fried plantain mush is really, really good), but in the bacon sleeve, they were unstoppable.

Bacon-Wrapped Shrimp Cakes (makes about 10)

-1 large plantain, green

-1 cup shrimp, chopped

-4 or 5 green onions, finely chopped

-Black pepper and garlic salt to taste (I think I used between 1/4 and 1/2 tsp of each)

-Coconut oil for frying (maybe 3-4 tbsp)

-10 strip of bacon

Peel the plantain, and chop it into a few big chunks, then whiz in a food processor until it's a fairly smooth "batter." Mix in the shrimp, green onions and seasoning. Form the mixture into 1" - 1.5" balls and place on wax paper (yes, your hands will get gross, but deal with it--your reward is bacon-wrapped treats). Heat the coconut oil over medium heat. When the pan is hot, carefully place a ball in, and squash it into a 1/2" thick patty. Repeat until the pan is full--I was able to cook 4 at a time. Cook a few minutes on each side, until nicely browned and crispy, and move to paper towels when done.

After all cakes have been cooked, wrap each cake in a slice of bacon, such that the "seam" is squarely in the middle of one side. Place each cake seam side down in the pan, and press the top with a spatula to help the seam close. Cook on each side until the bacon is crispy. From time to time, it's helpful to tip the cake at a 45 degree angle in the pan for a few seconds, so that the bacon on the sides of the cakes isn't still raw when the rest is done cooking.

Bacon it up!

~Losterman

Seafood-Stuffed Bell Peppers

Yay, this is the tastiest thing I've made in quite some time. Traditional stuffed peppers usually include rice, but I didn't miss it at all--these were crazy good.

Seafood-Stuffed Bell Peppers, Paleo Style

-2 green bell peppers, halved and cleaned

-2 tbsp grassfed clarified butter

-1/2 onion, diced

-1/2 red bell pepper, diced

-4 green onions, diced

-1 clove (or 1/2 tsp) garlic, minced

-1 6oz can of crab meat, drained

-4 or 5 oz frozen tiny shrimp (fully cooked/cleaned), thawed

-1/4 tsp...

...chili powder

...oregano

...basil

...black pepper

-1/8 tsp...

...red pepper flakes

...salt

...cayenne pepper (optional, but really tasty)

-1/4 cup tomato puree

-1/4 head cauliflower, grated (I used a cheese grater; this should come out to be a generous cup)

Preheat oven to 350 F. Prep all veggies. Cover the bottom of a baking dish with about 1/8" water, and set aside. Bring water to a rapid boil in a large pot, and parboil the 4 green pepper halves for 2-3 minutes (they should be just beginning to soften); place on paper towels to drain.

Melt butter in a large skillet over medium heat. Add onions, green onions, red bell peppers and garlic. Stirring constantly to avoid burning, saute until onions become translucent and begin to soften, about 5 minutes. Add shrimp, crab, and spices, and cook until thoroughly heated (2-3 min). Finally, add tomato puree and cauliflower, cook until thoroughly heated (1-2 min).

Place green bell peppers in baking dish, and stuff with filling. Bake until peppers are soft, about 20 minutes.

I easily ate an entire pepper (2 stuffed halves), and was sad when I could not eat anymore. This one is seriously a winner. I'd really like to try this with ground lamb or pork as well--maybe both.

Enjoy!

~Losterman

Paleo Pizza Bake

The semester is finally over, I am for realz ABD, and I realized that I could really go for some cheese. I'll pay for it later, but it was worth it. And honestly, this is barely even a recipe, but it's delicious, so here we go:

Paleo Pizza/Lasagna Bake

-1 pkg large pepperoni (around 20 slices)

-1 pkg large Canadian bacon (around 10 slices)

-1 2.25oz can sliced black olives

-6 oz package of sliced portabella mushrooms

-1/2 lb Italian sausage, cooked

-1/2 lb fresh mozzarella (preferably pastured, of course), grated

-2-3 oz parmesan, grated

-2 cups pizza sauce (I used my recipe)

Preheat oven to 400 F (actually, I initially set it to 350, but the cheese wasn't melting well after 10 minutes, so for the remaining time--6 minutes--I cooked it at 400). Cook up the sausage in a pan, and grate the cheese. In an 8"x8" casserole dish, layer the toppings in the following order (I guess you could do it in whatever order you'd like, but this seemed to create impressive cohesion):

1. 9 slices pepperoni (this should completely cover the bottom of the dish)

2. 9 slices Canadian bacon

3. Half of the mozzarella

4. Black olives

5. Mushrooms

6. Italian sausage

7. Pizza sauce

8. Pepperoni (another 9 slices)

9. Remaining mozzarella

10. Parmesan

Bake for 15-18 minutes, or until thoroughly heated, and cheese is melted.

Eating this was enlightening: traditional pizza is totally overrated. The crust just slows you down. Pure toppings is definitely the way to go.

~Losterman

Spicy Shrimp & Sausage Saute with Plantains

First experience preparing plantains--we were both a bit scared. However, this ended up being pretty simple to execute, and also pretty tasty! Enjoy.

Shrimp & Andouille Saute with Plantain "Fries"

Plantains:

-1 large plantain (ours was still pretty green, but beginning to ripen), peeled and chopped into 1/4" discs

-1-2 tbsp coconut oil

-1 dash mustard seeds

-1/2 tsp...

...chili powder

... turmeric

...salt

...pepper

-1/4 tsp...

...ground coriander

...cumin

-1/4 c water

Heat oil over medium heat. Add mustard seeds, and cover when they begin to pop, shaking the pan so they don't burn. When they stop popping, uncover and add plantains and all seasonings. Saute until they are well coated, then add water and cover. Cook until all water is absorbed (this only takes a few minutes, so keep an eye on them). Uncover, and saute until crispy.

In the meantime, you can be cooking your saute.

Sausage and Shrimp Saute:

-1 lb bag frozen baby shrimp (peeled, cleaned, cooked and all that jazz), thawed

-1 lb andouille sausage

-1/2 onion, finely chopped

-Black and red pepper to taste (we used around 1/2 tsp each)

-Hot sauce (optional--we used Blair's Mega Death Sauce, but only because we are awesome)

Add sausage to pan, and cook for a few minutes, until it begins to brown. Add onions, shrimp and seasonings and saute until the sausage is cooked, and the shrimp are heated through.

Overall, a super simple supper--I think total prep time was probably 25 minutes, and minimal chopping. Furthermore, the consensus, regarding both the plantains and the shrimp & sausage fry, was: "Solid."

~Losterman

Taro Chips Two Ways

After listening to the Chris Kresser episode of Robb Wolf's podcast, I was inspired to make the taro chips that Kresser described--sounded delicious. I tried making them with two different slicing techniques. First (pictured left) I used a vegetable peeler, which enables you to get super, super thin slices, and yields a product very similar to potato chips. Second, I just used a freshly sharpened chef's knife, and cut the slices as thin as I was able to do--which was pretty thin, but still several times thicker than I could get with the vegetable peeler. The product was somewhere between a potato skin and a pita chip. I think they'll be super great and versatile... I'm seeing paleo loaded potato skins and paleo chili nachos in the near future.

Taro Chips**

-1/2 of a taro root, peeled

-3-4 tbsp pastured butter, melted (or coconut oil, or pork fat...mmm, pork fat...)

-Salt, to garnish

Preheat oven to 400 F. Slice the taro root as you wish--use a vegetable peeler if you want "potato chips," and a sharp chefs knife if you want sturdier potato skinny/pita chippy type things. If the latter, do make a point of trying to get them as thin as you can. Lay the chips in a single layer on a cookie sheet (I had to do this in a couple of batches--1/2 a taro root produces a ton of chips), and brush with butter.

For thinner chips: Bake 6-8 minutes, until they are just starting to brown. They burn quick, so be careful.

For thicker chips: Bake 10-12 minutes, until the edges just begin to brown.

Carefully remove from pan with a spatula, and move to a plate to cool/crisp. Sprinkle with salt. Chow.

~Losterman

**Quick note--some people have an allergic reaction to taro (a funny itchy feeling toward the back of the tongue/throat), particularly if it's not cooked thoroughly enough. I don't have that problem, and I don't know if anyone would have that problem with these chips specifically, given how crispy they get, but...thought I'd mention it.

Epic Burger Night, Paleo Style

It was time, we realized yesterday, time to have Paleo Burger Night. In preparation, we gathered pastured bacon and bacon ends, pastured cream cheese, grass-fed beef, jalapeños and avocado, mushrooms, and onions, the ingredients for Son of Grok's BBQ sauce, and proceeded to cook enough food for a small to moderately sized party.

Things started off innocently enough, with grilled Jalapeño Poppers:

Paleo Pepper Poppers

(Makes 16)

-8 fresh jalapeños

-4 - 6 oz cream cheese

-16 strip of bacon

Cut the jalapeños in half and clean out the seeds. Fill with 1-3 tsp cream cheese, then wrap in bacon and skewer with a toothpick to keep the bacon in place. Grill until the bacon is crispy. (Well, we grilled, but you could easily broil them in an oven.)

After the poppers. we moved onto the burgers--more accurately, we made sliders.

Slider Patties

(Makes about 16)

-2 lbs ground beef

-1 egg

-1 or 2 cloves of garlic, minced

-A few dashes each of...

-Worcestershire sauce

-Paprika

-Seasoning Salt

Combine all ingredients in a bowl, then get in there and knead the meat with your hands until well mixed. Shape into balls, then flatten into small patties--ours were about 3" across raw. Grill (or pan fry, bake, etc) to taste. Very delicious and juicy.

At the start, we crafted some burgers with an eye for aesthetics--perhaps a little overboard on the aesthetics...

Above: Cream cheese, avocado and pan-fried bacon ends on a spinach salad.

Below: Cream cheese, cucumber, avocado and bacon on a bacon salad--smart. Nick doesn't mess around with spinach on Burger Night.

But then we got eager....

Above: SoG's BBQ sauce, mushrooms & onions sauteed in bacon grease, topped with bacon.

And then we got gluttonous, sloppy, and out-of-control....

Above: Half a slider with almond butter, cream cheese, avocado, and bacon, garnished with ghost chili hot sauce.

We also made baked sweet potatoes, but the burgers were way too distracting--we never got to them.

Okay, so seriously. Would anyone really miss having a bun amidst all this crazy burger and bacon action? Honestly, I think buns would have slowed us down, trammeled our creativity, and stifled our bacon-sprinkled dreams.

Paleo burger night, FTW.

~Losterman

Adventures With Hash Browns

I've been working on sweet potato hash browns lately, via two methods: 1) (pictured above, topped with chorizo) sweet potato + egg, and 2) sweet potato only. I think 2) is tastier, but 1) sticks together better, and thus is more picturesque.

Sweet Potato Hash Browns: v1

(Serves 2)

-1 sweet potato, grated (I did this with a cheese grater)

-1 egg

-1-2 tbsp of pastured butter, bacon/chorizo grease, or coconut oil

-Salt and pepper to garnish

Place shredded sweet potato between two paper towels and squeeze out as much moisture as you can, repeat as necessary (I went through 2 or 3 sets of paper towels before I got bored). Place in a bowl, and mix with egg. Heat your grease of choice over medium heat. When pan is hot, add half the potato/egg mix to the pan, and flatten with a spatula, spreading it out as evenly and thinly as possible in the pan. Keep pressing it down with the spatula as you cook. Cook on this side until browned/until its easy to flip (around 2 - 4 minutes), then cook the other side, again around 2 - 4 minutes.

Pretty tasty, but i don't find that the hash browns get very crispy, and the egg messes with the texture, as well as the grease-absorption capacity (which I think is very important, especially if you're eating grass-fed meat--don't be wasting that tasty, tasty grease).

So v2:

Sweet Potoato Hash-browns: v2

-1 sweet potato, grated

-1 - 2 tbsp of grease of choice

-Salt and pepper to garnish

Same instructions as above, just cook until the outside gets crispy, but I won't give you any false hopes about this sticking together when you flip it. Clumps of it will adhere, but it doesn't look all Waffle House picture-perfect. However, without the egg, the hash browns are a lot crispier, and they will do a much better job of soaking up the grease of any meat you top it with--I recommend fresh chorizo.

If anyone has a method of doing this that nails both the taste and the aesthetics, I'm all ears.

~Losterman

(Are a disproportionately high number of these posts devoted to breakfast?)